How to spend your first morning in Paris when the future feels unsteady.

Part poem, part itinerary, part travelogue.

My husband and I in Paris. February 2023.

How to spend your first morning in Paris when the future feels unsteady.

Even though you are exhausted, wake up early. 

Open the bedroom window and let the sounds of a foreign city fill your rented apartment. Sit in your pajamas sipping coffee from someone else’s chipped ceramic mug.

Swallow down the heaviness that has gathered in the back of your throat and keep your chin up as you stroll through the Marais. 

Push past the jet lag and lingering sadness on your way to a café on Place des Vosges.¹

Order the hot chocolate. Scoop airy heaps of whipped cream into your mug.

Joy will take hold of your aching heart. 

Let it. 

Say merci as often as you can.

Merci to the woman who places a white linen napkin in your hands.

Merci to the man who holds the door open for you.

Merci to the fruit ripening inside the Marché aux Enfants Rouges.²

And yes, even though it feels impossible, merci to this period of grief someday, but probably not this day. Not while the cold February air is blowing back your hair on Rue Saint-Louis en l’Île.³