Some thoughts on feeling festive.

Is the holiday spirit just a decision?

My husband and I put up our tree two days after Thanksgiving. It took a few hours to transform our small apartment into a glowing winter oasis complete with white lights and little details of pine and red berries. When I found myself in the grocery store the following day, I picked up a special holiday-themed cinnamon creamer and grabbed a limited-edition seasonal snack mix. On my commute home from work that week, I listened as The Eagles sang longingly for someone to please come home for Christmas and I slowed down to look at homes that out did themselves with décor. By the end of the week, I felt softer around the edges.

I found myself - one decision at a time - fully immersed in holiday joy. 

A Christmas morning charcuterie board has become my favorite holiday tradition.

Is the holiday spirit just a decision? A decision to put on a red sweater with the word “merry” across the front, bake a batch of sugar cookies in the shape of snowmen, and decorate the tree with careful resolve?

Maybe.

Let me be clear: I’m not suggesting we can force ourselves into a constant state of cheerfulness. Nor should we. In fact, it is perfectly ok to loathe this time of year. It is ok not to feel one ounce of jolliness, to just survive until the new year, to do the best you can even if that looks like sitting in the front seat of your car outside of Macy’s screaming at the windshield. The holidays can be difficult, grief-ridden, and absolutely triggering.

In the past, I spent the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas complaining about excessive consumerism, dreading the awkward small talk at parties, and cringing at the cliched movies that played incessantly on network television. I would drive around the crowded mall parking lot cursing shoppers and began to feel the pressure of new year resolutions before our artificial tree was upright. 

But this year feels different. I’m leaning into generosity, forgiveness, and gratitude. 

Of course, there’s the looming question of whether it is okay to feel this joyful. In the midst of heartbreaking social and racial inequities in our country, an anxiety-provoking election ramping up, and people dying by the thousands, are we just supposed to keep buying each other gifts? Is it even appropriate to embrace holiday merriment?

I think so.

I think the pursuit of joy runs somewhere through the middle – along the seams of the unbearably bleak news headlines and the absolute delight my best friend’s children feel about the elf that Santa sent to them. I think it’s okay to slow down and take it all in - one decision at a time.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this.

In the meantime, happy-ish? holidays.

Lexi

P.S. - Next year, I’ll be offering an additional, more vulnerable post for paid subscribers. I hope you’ll consider upgrading your subscription and joining an intimate community while also supporting something I love. If not, you will still receive free content every month. Either way, I’m so glad you’re here.

---

10 decisions that are keeping the holiday spirit alive for me:

1. Lighting scented candles: pine, cinnamon, apple cider, some warm and spicy mixture that a colleague hand-poured for me last year. 

2. Writing notes in our holiday cards.

3. Hanging a wreath covered in pinecones and red metal bells on our front door.

4. Watching all the holiday classics and a few newer movies as well. I’m also enjoying these holiday-ish films (you know, the ones that aren’t technically holiday movies, but still feel incredibly festive): Meet Me in St. Louis, While You Were Sleeping, and Just Friends.

5. Listening to this seasonal playlist that I carefully curated. It’s a combination of my favorites along with a special addition of Jump (For My Love) by the Pointer Sisters because, let’s face it, Hugh Grant’s character in Love Actually dancing down the staircase at 10 Downing Street has become an iconic scene in holiday cinematic history.

6. Adding all the seasonal-flavored creamers to my coffee: peppermint mocha, cinnamon, sugar cookie, gingerbread, you name it and I’ve either ruined my latte with it or found something that tastes delightfully like the holidays.

7. Saving recipes like this one for easy-ish holiday baking idea and this one if I start to feel bold.

8. Taking the long way home to look at neighborhoods with great decorations.

9. Cleaning out my closet and giving away winter clothes I no longer need.

10. Saying no. I’m intentionally not overscheduling myself this season so that I can wake up on Christmas morning and be fully present rather than rundown and on edge after too many busy weekends and late nights.